When I think of them, I feel regrets of my presence being absent occasionally. I have lost two family members, within half of a month apart. The pain that I go through is unbearable due to lack of their touch or sight. Death can be a very hurtful and scary, but picturing eternal afterlife can be so beautiful. I will be sharing my experience of losing two family members. I had a wonderful cousin, who loved to love people and have fun, who went by the name of Darrel Broussard. Since he was one of the youngest in the family, we referred to him as “Pee-Wee”.
He was a very handsome and laid-back young man. Darrel was twenty-four years old who survived by two beautiful little girls. He left behind a huge and beautiful family, including his favorite cousin, which is me. The last time I spent time with Darrel, he had taken me to the fair. I had a good time that night, despite the fact that he didn’t want to join me on any rides. He bought me a pair of shades, which I still have to this day. He also bought himself a couple of things that grabbed his attention. He didn’t mind spending money on me because we had been favorite cousins since our younger ages.
Throughout our lives, we lost contact, but eventually reconnected like magnets. I slowly stopped hearing from him, until I found out the devastating news from his father, which is my uncle. December 20, 2012 was the date that I received the news that his lovely soul had suddenly been taken away from him. The death of him slashed my heart deeply, while tearing me into pieces. It felt as if my heart had shattered, like a broken mirror. While he was home alone, quietly minding his business, a male broke into his home not knowing Darrel was there.
My cousin put up a ood fight for his life, as evidence stated Darrel had the victim’s skin under his nails. His mother came home to find him deceased. The funeral of my loved cousin was December 29, 2012. It was so beautiful but also very terrifying and depressing altogether. I couldn’t believe that he was gone that quickly. Yes, our lives do have to come to an end one day, but I wasn’t prepared for him to leave me. Even though that scar will remain on my heart, I know he is eternally resting in peace, and I accept that. My grandmother, Carrol Broussard, was an up-to-date fashionable woman.
She always wanted her hair done, and to certainly smell the best. She was 70 years young. Yes, I say young because that’s just how she acted. She was married to my wonderful grandfather. His name is Clifton Broussard, who is the age of 76. She survived ten children, and a high number of grandchildren and great grandchildren, leaving me behind. Carrol was a stern human-being who wanted things done a certain way. The last time I remember spending time with her, she wanted me to style her hair for her. I had just bathed and she asked me what kind of soap I was using. I gave it to her because just like I said, she loved to smell good.
I even painted her nails and toes, just as she always liked. Even though we didn’t always meet eye to eye, are hearts were connected as one. I called her one day, as she informed me she was doing fine. A week later, my father calls crying, saying she was in the hospital dying. February 2, 2013 was that date that god received her soul. A couple of nights before, she was experiencing shortness of breaths. She didn’t tell my grandfather until the next day and when she did, it was too late. She died in my grandfather’s arms while he was dressing her, as the ambulance was on the way.
After being rushed to the hospital, she had seizures that whole day into the next morning while on the Life Support machine. I watched her fight for her life, and eventually watched her pass away as well. I wish I could take back all the times I didn’t spend with her. Every day, that eats me up inside that I didn’t. Even though that scar will remain on my heart, I know she is eternally resting in peace, and I accept that. I am shedding tears now as I write this because it is terribly hurting me. I fully realize that you shouldn’t take anyone for granted because they can be here today and gone tomorrow.
I also realize that god does things for a reason. I disagree with him at times and I get furious with him. I even question him, even though I’m not supposed to. Despite these negative feelings, I eventually come to and understanding and an acceptance. No one will ever understand why god does things but this is his world and we are his creations. He is the almighty father and he will do whatever he pleases. I now answer ever phone call I get, even if I’m not in the mood to talk. I never know when that could be the last call that person has, or maybe even the last one I might receive.
It hurts knowing that life can be taken away from a human-being instantly. These two incidents made a huge positive and negative impact on my life. Positive, because it made me open my eyes more and to easily accept that my family members are in a better place. Negative, because it was just too sudden and made me feel very dejected. God and family is all a person will have at the end of the day. No matter how much you talk to them, how much you argue with them, or even if you hardly ever talk with them at all. They were placed in your life for a reason and will remain there.
I take into consideration other people’s feelings and thoughts more than I do myself. I try to live more and more by god’s word daily. I will give someone my last. Life may not be what you expect or want it to be, but every day you should be more and more thankful for it and the people in it. Think of the saying: What would Jesus do, and stick to that. No one is created to be perfect. We should smile more, give more than we receive, and love more than we hate. We are living in our last days and we need to use our time wisely. God has our lives planned out. So, we need to make him and ourselves proud and acceptable.